Dead Christmas Trees…

Dead Christmas Tree, originally uploaded by MOLIBLOG.

Hello reader,

Sorry it’s been ages since I last uploaded a blog. Like all good New Year’s resolutions this one didn’t last very long. I wanted to write at the end of January but things just got so silly that I never had the time.

As January came to an end, I started to have chest pains and felt weak. I decided to go along to the doctors and get it checked out. With Fleur away in Australia I had nobody to discuss my condition with and all manner of things came to mind. A Heart Attack was the first of the many terrible conditions that I could be torn apart with and I began thinking about my legacy and all the lovely things I’d never get to do again or for the first time. While waiting in the doctor’s reception the electronic sign beeped and displayed the next patient to be called in. Now, some things are unavoidable, such as spontaneous laughter or having an uncle bill. While staring at the board, a name beeped into life. “Next Patient, Mr CockHead.” I burst out into childish laughter and the man sitting right in front of me was not looking too impressed. Anyway. My time finally came. Not in the death sense but to be examined for the chest pains. After a short explanation from me, she immediately grabbed her phone and started to call for an ambulance. I asked her, “why?” She said I was having a heart attack and I needed to go to the hospital. Now my heart was really beating fast. My first thought was Holy Fuck… My second was a little more controlled. Really? I refused to go to the hospital in an ambulance but I did promise to drive myself there. I booked into A&E and was given a name tag with the words, Mark Oliver, NUTS. This I’m glad to say refers to my allergy and not my mental state. At least I hope so!!! Anyway, after various tests, x-rays, screaming children throwing up everywhere and an ECG it turns out that I wasn’t having a heart attack after all. I can’t tell you what a relief that is. Not dying is such a joy. Needless to say I decided to go back to the doctor and ask for a second opinion which fortunately meant seeing a better doctor who was able to realise that not every chest pain is a heart attack. It turns out that after having a year of shit in 2010, a busy Christmas and not much fun I was suffering from stress. It all sounds so simple when you think about it. It has been a tough year and I need to learn to switch off and relax. Something I’m told I really need to do or I’ll end up having a heart attack and be deader than all those brown Christmas trees in the basement.

You would imagine then that I needed to avoid stress. Well I do, but the universe has other ideas. While driving back my car decided to do what I fortunately didn’t. Die… The most expensive part of a Super Charged Mini to go wrong is the bloody Super Charger and that’s what happened. The man from Green Flag was very good and said he would arrange for it to be taken to a garage for a quote. He said that I should normally wait with him but I he felt I didn’t look too well and should just get myself home. Everyone’s a critic!!! Well, the repair bill came in at £2000 and I’m still stressed. However, the car drives like a treat.

Not long after I got the car back but my HTC HD Desire phone decided to join the choir invisible. I paid £500 for it and while it’s away for repair I have a phone from the 1980’s that barely sends a text message. Deep joy. Will I ever catch a break? I already hate 2011 and it’s only February. All in all, I could do without all the stress.

One thing I’ve done to help me relax is learn how to make a website for all my favourite pictures. Check it out and tell me what you think.

www.mark-oliver.co.uk

Before I sign off, here is a little insight into my working day.

A man comes up to me while I’m standing next to the SatNav counter. “Can you tell me where the SatNav’s are?” I said, “Turn around when possible. You have reached your destination”

Take care,

Moli

One thought on “Dead Christmas Trees…

  • February 26, 2011 at 3:11 pm
    Permalink

    so, meditation is required M.
    And, I believe in Pilates. Thanks for the update in m Blog – enjoyed it x

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